Pre - NS Occurance

In 2 weeks time i will be embarking on my journey to a new way of life - the military life. Yes, i will be enlisting in 16th Mar so those of you who want to send me my last journey (haha...choy !!! Touchwood) juz be present at Pasir Ris Bus Interchange 8am. Hahahaha. Well, i am not really excited about enlistment, neither am i anxious, worried or scared. I shall leave the fear and worry for this friday when my A lvl results are released bah. Anyway, starting a few days ago i've been shopping for some items that i may want to bring to camp tekong. Though i've not bought all the essential items recorded in the "unofficial guide" to newbies passed down verbally by seniors, relatives and peers currently serving the nation, i think it wont take long for me to finish my shopping list, hopefully by this weekend (that is, if i am not overly depressed over my A lvl results)...




Anyway, above are the items i've purchased. Lets see...
1. Hangers: for hanging uniforms of coz
2. Shower Lotion: for bathing of coz
3. Soap: Can be used to wash anything from body to clothes to even the floor.
4. Plastic Basket: To put small items like polish, handphones, etc so that they will not end up everywhere inside the cupboard.
5. Toothbrush: to brush teeth lah
6. Plaster: i dunno why i wanna bring that but my father insists so...
7. FM Receiver a.k.a radio: Of coz i hav to bring that, i cant live a day without listening to radio, and of coz my fave station radio 1003. Hahaha.
8. Fragrance Packet: To be hung inside e cupboard to prevent the worst smell that kills every insect within 10m radius.

Anyway, i think this is a norm, and that is my parents were more worried than i am. It is as if they were the ones serving the nation. I mean, come on, give me a break, you no need to be that worried. Well, i understand why they were so worried but if you compare their level of worry with mine, it is like 100 000 : 1? Everytime they have a chance to talk about NS, they will start nagging and nagging about this and that like how i should act, about how harsh the situation is and how i should endure, blah blah blah. My father still thinks the current NS system is similar to the time when he serve his NS donkey years ago where human rights is a question mark to the sirs and recruits back then.

And for their constant concerning naggings, i can tabulate a list of the top 20 most common statements they made with regards to the number of times each statement was said. And i must emphasize, the statements were repeated word by word! Exactly word by word. I think i can even memorize them. Can you imagine how fustrated i got everytime the topic of NS was brought about? Hence, i've constructed a chart of the top 10 things they've always not fail to repeat:

1. You dont worry too much lah (looks whos the one that is worrying). I last time skinnier than you only dunno how many pounds also go in then come out safely like that. See your that friend that friend (he is making comparison b/w me and someone else) also skinny skinny go in then also no complain...blah blah blah...you must be mentally prepared (looks whos the one that should be mentally prepared)...blah blah blah...no matter how tough it is you also must carry on (contradicts with statement no. 8) blah blah blah and if you really meet any trouble...you must tell me, i got a friend who works as a regular blah blah blah (spare me the trouble and embarrassment please)... (5024 times)

2. You dont have time to wash clothes one. So everytime when you bathe/shower, shun bian wash your clothes there...blah blah blah...wash clothes finish le then bathe...do everything in the one cubicle...blah blah blah...then can save time... (i assure you if i do that, the long queue behind me waiting for shower will kill me instantly one k.o) (4021 times)

3. Remember to drink alot of water...blah blah blah...coz weather will b very hot...blah blah blah (3677 times)

4. You cannot be scared of insects one. There alot of insects like beetles, cockroaches, centipedes, etc (wadeva hell insects) then you cannot take gun shoot them bcoz you are afraid of them blah blah blah ...(like i will make a fool out of myself liddat) ... (3591 times)

5. If got any items you lack or use finish alreadi can buy from the canteen one...blah blah blah...the canteen will be open until dunno wad hell time and at that time i always hungry then sneak down for supper blah blah blah...(3046 times)

6. Last time we must polish our boots until clean clean shiny shiny one...blah blah blah...then to prepare for our POP we will light the candle to polish our shoe wif a spoon blah blah blah...then seargent see not shiny enough throw it down from 3 storeys (2877 times)

7. No need to bathe in the morning. You dont have the luxury to. (Like i will in tekong)...you need to be quick. If the next morning the you need to wear wad outfit you just wear it to sleep the night b4...blah blah blah (2314 times)

8. If you cannot take it anymore (during running / training) you must stop and tell your officer. They wont force you to continue one. Last time during SOC those very obese one cannot climb over the wall blah blah blah then the sir finally just ask them to walk by blah blah blah. (2003 times)

9. Remember to powder your feet and else where blah blah blah coz you will get dirty and sticky after training and blah blah blah...you only get to bath once...(1953 times)

10. The food there was horrible. I actually got to eat a piece of pork with a thick layer of skin blah blah blah...and the bread is made from changi prison...blah blah blah...so hard that it can rebounce when hit against the wall. (1874 times)

(All statements are written in first person p.o.v, i.e. my father's. Everything in brackets and italics are my p.o.v.)

Anyway, one other thing is that my parents like to make comparison with me and one of my childhood friend (he was enlisted in jan) whom i've not spoken to for decades...i mean years. Yah...and then they will start to hear news and details from anyone they can get from and start re-iterating it to me. Like for example, "eh...that who who who hor say this this this leh...". And also, they will deliberately go ask my that childhood friends' parents for details...like my father telling my mother "hey, rmb to call xxx's mother and ask her bout this this this...", then hours later 'hey, also can you call xxx's father to ask him bout that that that...". Waseh...such pre-NS occurance. Haha. I dont know whether to laugh or cry. Thats why i've told my sister "thankgoodness you no need to serve NS". The meaning is not that she does not need to go through the pain of NS but the pain of parents nagging to you. Haha. But then i must emphasize that my parents dotes on me alot and they are extremely worried that their only son is gonna serve the nation. Alright, i shall be a good boy (i mean MAN) and look after myself. Dont worry bout me too much yeah!